how to argue and win every time Essay

1186 Words 5 Pages
HOW TO ARGUE AND WIN EVERYTIME

Jerry Spence startes off by asking why do we argue? He says that he doesn't like to argue and he doesn't like people that do. The confused me at first. He askes why not ty to get along, and besides when he argues he loses. He says we were born to make a winning argument just as we were born to walk. Mr. Spence says that we are so bound up, so mute. From the moment we have been conditioned to avoid confrontation. We have been taught not to let our emotions show. By the time we become adults the word argue calls up dark and negative feelings. Many throughout our lives have forced up to accept their ways, their relugion, their values, ect...
The key to our freedom is embarrassingly obvious. We need only to
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If you act superior to them, you will probably make them your enemies and never gain their trust. Mr. Spence says that, in your personal relationships, you may find the only way to win an argument is to lose. If the only way to win your point is to destroy the relationship, you may find it's better to concede.
This was an excellent book on argumentation skills. However, first you have to define what it is to win. What do you want to get from the argument and what are you willing to risk to get that? Through several examples he works out how to win by losing, how to win by empowering others, how to win by redirecting the prejudice of others or using that prejudice to your advantage, etc.
He spends a great deal of time discussing the importance of using stories to illustrate points and does a fine job of it. The book is filled with stories and experiences from his real life courtroom experiences and how his arguments affected the jury, sometimes in a manner that surprised him and sometimes in the manner he expected. Even when the results were a surprise he explains why, after thinking about it, the decision went the way it did.
The book is highly slanted toward the argument styles of a lawyer in front of a jury. However, it is useful to anyone in any potentially argumentative situation where a position has to be taken and defended. How to argue, how to win, when to argue, when to shut up, it all starts with

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